


Gradually

by Donchushka



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-19
Updated: 2014-11-19
Packaged: 2018-02-26 07:32:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2643449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donchushka/pseuds/Donchushka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan can’t tell Phil that he loves him all at once, so he does it gradually.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gradually

It seems to Phil that he says ‘I love you’ in the most boring way possible: he does not buy Dan a million roses, does not pay a lot of money for the words to appear in the sky, does not light up all those aromatic candles that fill their flat. The words just escape him without asking for permission, and Phil worries only about them sounding as confident as they were in his head for the last couple of weeks.

Dan, of course, instantly looks at him with wide eyes, unable to believe in what he just heard, and Phil thinks for a second that he will ask shyly, “Me?..”, as though that could be said to someone else. Dan tries to say something but it looks like he’s got a lump in his throat which does not allow him to say a word. Phil’s heart drops but flies back up momentarily when Dan throws his arms around him, nuzzling into his neck, whispering, “I… I… I…”

“I know”, Phil responses quietly, hugging Dan back, and he can feel Dan relaxing in his arms. He can almost hear words rushing through Dan’s mind, trying to find their way out, and smiles, knowing that someday they will manage to do it.

*

This very evening Phil finds a sticky note on the bathroom mirror.

_I love your eyes._

He knows that, apart from Dan, this could be written only by house demons who regularly steal their bright socks and favorite t-shirts, but Dan himself does not say anything and keeps staring at his laptop when Phil comes out of the bathroom, so Phil decides not to pressure him.

Next day is one of those lazy days when they can spend approximately eleven hours on the sofa without moving, order a giant pizza, watch Adventure Time and just forget that there is some other world outside their apartment. Phil’s wrapped in the blanket (central heating in the house works terribly) and he hardly can pay attention to what is happening on the screen because he is just so happy. By the end of the forth episode Dan throws his own blanket away, so he and Phil can share one, and does not stop making sarcastic comments about the plot and mimicking main characters. When Phil decides to say something as well, they just look at each other for a couple of seconds and then burst out laughing because his words make absolutely no sense. Wiping away the tears of laughter, Phil has to admit to himself that never in his life have stupid things felt so right.

In the evening Phil decides to be productive and spends usual half an hour in front of the camera, telling the whole world about another funny and weird thing that happened to him recently. When he is almost done, Dan jumps in the room scarring him but not surprising. They talk about some nonsense for several minutes and then Dan kisses Phil on the cheek and smirks at the camera before leaving. Unable to stop smiling like an idiot Phil makes a mental note to cut that bit out during editing.

Before going to sleep he finds two stick notes in the bathroom – bright yellow and pale green.

_I love your laughter._

_I love your voice._

He carefully removes them from the mirror to put in the nightstand. Dan is wrapped in the blanket so Phil can see only his nose and breathes too steadily to actually be asleep and Phil notices that he is smiling.

In the morning, after sending Dan to the shop – “You eat as much as I do but I can’t be bothered to go out today” – Phil looks at the new note and tries to count the number of times when Dan allowed him to trace his collarbones, shoulders, chest and even neck with his fingers and melted under the gentle touch without flinching or wincing, letting his cynical mask disappear and for several minutes becoming open and vulnerable. And no one except Phil will ever get to see this. Phil remembers goosebumps which so easily appear on Dan’s skin, his closed eyes and trembling eyelashes and loses count, just hiding the red note from the rest of the world.

_I love your hands._

*

The number of bright notes in Phil’s drawer grows every day and they become longer and more sincere.

_I love it when you stick out your tongue while smiling._

_I love it when you put on mismatching socks._

_I love the way you suspiciously look at the clock in the morning._

_I love that we live together (but seriously, stop stealing my cereal)._

_I love those weird moles which you are covered with._

_I love your glasses (you should wear them more often)._

But of course, Dan never stops being Dan, Phil thinks, giggling at another note which appeared on the mirror by the end of the second week. He looks at the skinny jeans to which he was trying to get used to at home before actually wearing them outside and which are now lying in the corner, and looks back at the note. It seems like Dan is not quite satisfied with just undressing him with his eyes and later on – with his hands.

 _I love your ass,_ says the purple note.

*

In a couple of days Phil stands in the kitchen, trying to cook something Mexican and constantly checking on the spluttering pan. Dan is sitting on the kitchen table (after that time when he almost chopped his arm off while cutting the pepper, they both decided it will be better for everyone if he stays away from the cooker) and Phil is telling him something about penguins which he saw earlier on the Discovery channel. Phil’s head is filled with useless facts about animals and he is not sure that Dan even pays attention to him. To be honest, he expects to be interrupted in any time. He takes a knife that looks more like a little axe, and it is then when Dan cuts him off, saying, “I love you.”

Phil instantly forgets about the number of feathers in the left wing of the healthy emperor penguin and looks at him with wide eyes, not caring about the hot pan anymore. His face, probably, displaces such disbelief that Dan looks like he’s ready to turn the whole thing into a joke, just to avoid the awkward situation. Dan doesn’t have a chance to say another word though, because Phil puts the knife down and kisses him, feeling the smile on his lips and sighing with relief. Everything was always in the right place, their relationship just got a little bit clearer.

*

Phil knows what note he will find today but, instead of removing it, he places another next to it.

_I love you._

_I love you too._


End file.
